<div dir="ltr">This has spiraled into people hurting each other's feelings. I'm sorry for everyone involved.<div><br></div><div>On October 14th, we integrated a change that makes the tone of public reminders clearer and tries to avoid both public shaming and private bullying:</div><div><br></div><div>> <a href="https://github.com/osmlab/CoC-mailing-lists/pull/13/files" target="_blank">https://github.com/osmlab/CoC-mailing-lists/pull/13/files<br></a></div></div><div class="gmail_extra"><br><div class="gmail_quote">On Mon, Dec 1, 2014 at 11:26 PM, Melelani Sax-Barnett <span dir="ltr"><<a href="mailto:saxbarm@gmail.com" target="_blank">saxbarm@gmail.com</a>></span> wrote:<br><blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">Hi folks,<br><br>Let's all please take a deep breath and try to calm down. <br><br>I'd like to share something we recently implemented as a very important part of our code of conduct at my workplace: the assumption of good intent. That is, the first time someone does something that offends someone else, we should assume good intent.<br><br>I think it's extremely unlikely that Alyssa was trying to hurt or offend anyone by what she said, but unfortunately it did end up doing so. The next step would be to let the person know that it was hurtful and why in a polite way and ask that they don't repeat the behavior. I'm not saying that it's not okay to be angry, but it's important at this stage to remain as level-headed as possible or seek the help of a mediator to make sure your message is communicated successfully. At the same time, the person who mistakenly acted in an offensive way is expected to demonstrate that they are listening and that they will try their best to avoid similar offenses in the future.<br><br>I know this probably all sounds silly, but we make mistakes, we will always make mistakes, let's try not to repeat them but use them as an opportunity to learn from each other.<br><br>My best,<br>Mele <br><div class="HOEnZb"><div class="h5"><div class="gmail_quote">On Mon, Dec 1, 2014 at 7:52 PM Randal Hale <<a href="mailto:rjhale@northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">rjhale@northrivergeographic.com</a>> wrote:<br><blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
<div bgcolor="#FFFFFF" text="#000000">
In general - yeah. But if we all unsubscribed who would get
offended. Alyssa already set the mark for worst person in existence
and I always thought that was the other guy. <br>
<br>
I can't decide if I find it all funny or sad. I'm leaning more
towards sad. But then I'd offend those with Season Affective
Disorder...and get 42 emails describing me as the 2nd worst person
ever past Alyssa. <br>
<br>
Anyway, <br>
<br>
Randy</div><div bgcolor="#FFFFFF" text="#000000"><br>
<br>
<br>
<div>On 12/01/2014 10:46 PM, Jo Walsh wrote:<br>
</div>
<blockquote type="cite">
<p>Wow. Um. Okay, if this list is going to be asshole-free then we
are almost all going to have to unsubscribe immediately.</p>
<p>Okay, now the irony has kicked in, this is hilarious. Tearing
strips off one another over minor points of semantics during a
discussion about discursive civility. The whole thing reads like
a performance parody. And this is what it is like in New York
all this time? Maybe I should go back there :) <br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
</p>
<div class="gmail_quote">On Dec 2, 2014 1:58 AM, "Randal Hale"
<<a href="mailto:rjhale@northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">rjhale@northrivergeographic.com</a>>
wrote:<br type="attribution">
<blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
<div bgcolor="#FFFFFF" text="#000000"> Whoever admins this
list - Serge should be removed for that email. If it doesn't
happen I'm out. <br>
<br>
Bully all you want on whatever other list your on - this one
should be asshole free. <br>
<br>
Someone let me know if he's allowed to stay after that
outburst. <br>
<br>
Randy<br>
<br>
<br>
<div>On 12/01/2014 08:30 PM, alyssa wright wrote:<br>
</div>
<blockquote type="cite">
<div dir="ltr">first ,congratulations to me for being the
most offensive person ever to you. i can only imagine
what a high bar that is. second, i have a traumatic
brain injury. it is no fucking joke so lay off AND there
is a lot i have evidence of similarities between certain
tbi's and autism. and finally, who may i ask if the
fucking public shamer in this scenario? i am happy to
work on an inclusive and safe coc that but i refuse to
work with assholes.
<div><br>
</div>
<div>period, </div>
<div>alyssa. <br>
<div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div><br>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="gmail_extra"><br>
<div class="gmail_quote">On Mon, Dec 1, 2014 at 8:15
PM, Serge Wroclawski <span dir="ltr"><<a href="mailto:emacsen@gmail.com" target="_blank">emacsen@gmail.com</a>></span>
wrote:<br>
<blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">Alyssa,<br>
<br>
While in OSM I've been called a pig, an imbecile,
a bimbo, and a host<br>
of other terms, but your mail is absolutely,
without a doubt the most<br>
offensive thing I've experienced in my time in
OpenStreetMap.<br>
<br>
While I feel bad for your accident, saying that
this makes you<br>
"neuro-diverse" is incredibly insensitive and
rude.<br>
<br>
First of all, the term for people who differ from
the norm in terms of<br>
neurology are called "nero-divergent", not
"neuro-diverse", and second<br>
of all, your comparison of people who have
conditions like autism or<br>
learning disabilities to people who've been in an
accident is so<br>
offensive that I don't have the words for it.<br>
<br>
Second of all, it's not enough that you make
neuro-divergent people<br>
uncomfortable at events, including my fiancée (who
by the way has<br>
Aspegers), but now you've decided to shame her,
and shame me, and<br>
every other person who has been born with a
neurological disorder?<br>
<br>
You should absolutely be ashamed of yourself. This
is the exact type<br>
of behavior that a code of conduct should in place
to stop.<br>
<br>
Sincerely,<br>
<br>
- Serge Wroclawski<br>
</blockquote>
</div>
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Randal Hale
North River Geographic Systems, Inc
<a href="http://www.northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">http://www.northrivergeographic.com</a>
<a href="tel:423.653.3611" value="+14236533611" target="_blank">423.653.3611</a> <a href="mailto:rjhale@northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">rjhale@northrivergeographic.com</a>
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<pre cols="72">--
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Randal Hale
North River Geographic Systems, Inc
<a href="http://www.northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">http://www.northrivergeographic.com</a>
<a href="tel:423.653.3611" value="+14236533611" target="_blank">423.653.3611</a> <a href="mailto:rjhale@northrivergeographic.com" target="_blank">rjhale@northrivergeographic.com</a>
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